Here are two poems which clearly demonstrate that I was born and raised in Christendom. It would have been easier had I been able to find my way with that heritage. It simply never, not one time, held any spiritual meaning for me. If I was a stranger in my school, I was so much more a stranger in my church.
In my last two years of high school, my mother insisted. She searched out a liberal Christian congregation, and took my sister and I there, made us join the church youth group and then because I could sing Baritone and knew how to read music well enough to sing among other good singer readers, I joined the choir and my sister did too. That choir was run by a professional and he had a budget that allowed him to anchor each section with a paid professional singer. I didn't like going to youth group and would have hated church except the music saved it for me. I was actually confirmed.
As soon as high school was over, even with the music, I promptly stopped going. I had learned very little. Here are two Christian poems, sort of.
When The Angels Fall
When the angels fall
The wings go first, tearing off
And twisting like leaves.
Angels are bouyant,
Their wings are solid to catch
The air, the heaviest part.
Wingless angels drift
And grieve, they suffer.
This grief makes more mass
And angels sink from that, fall
Faster, become darts of pain
While they shed white clothes.
They descend, enter
The world as small pink bodies,
Gasp, begin to breathe.
**********************************
Satan has two names. His other name in my opinion is his true name. Lucifer. My name is Christopher, bearer of Christ, as in carrying Christ. Luci is like lucid, means clarity or clear light. Lucifer then is the bearer of clarity or the bearer of the clear light. I have a suspicion Lucifer has been falsely accused. There are many Christians who deny the existence of the Devil. Actually that word is interesting too. Devil goes all the way back to Indo-European because it appears in Sanskrit as Deva, and there it means deity. By the way look at that too. Dei = dev, and even closer when Latin Deus, deu = dev, but a little further when Greek, theo = deu = dev = dei. See how this changes but stays the same? That is comparative linguistics and points out how languages evolve according to certain rules. Devil is an evil god because he is real, generic and not the Trinitarian Father. In fact, the Bible does not really say the false gods are not real gods.
Om namo bhagavate vasudevaya. A most famous twelve syllable mantra, twelve being the number of the whole, twelve signs of the Zodiac, twelve months of the year, a dozen eggs, twelve inches, and so on. Vasudeva, the father of Krishna, vasudevaya is the son of Vasudeva, the ya being a patronimic. And in this case Krishna the son of Vasudeva is found within us. Deva. Vasu = good, deva = god. Good God Fathers the Son Krishna. Hmmm. That is what is within.
Does this change devil for you? Does this show why Lucifer, the bearer of the clear light might be a better name for the devil?
Lucifer's Complaint
I hate getting caught.
When your foot comes down on me
I stare, howl my rage
And fear.
Then I am renewed,
Again set up on my throne
To resume my rule
And hope.
I am bewildered.
How has this happened to me,
Always you stepping
On me?
Contraction
1 week ago
Well, you couldn't see the light if it were not for the dark.
ReplyDeleteFallen Angels....hmmmm, yes.
Michelle, you should come back, I didn't finish the blog and it posted half done.
ReplyDeleteI was too polite to leave a comment earlier about your counting skills :)
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts re the 'devil' are, well, that fear is he and we create 'him' for ourselves. In a roundabout kind of way.
I try not to give Lucifer too much energy....he likes it too much and I only just got his foot off my neck!! :)
xxx
When Angels Fall -- I love the progression of this from bouyant angel to heavy human.
ReplyDeleteAs to Lucifer -- Just curious and just asking: from where do you think evil comes, and how do we make sense of it?
Michelle and Karen, I don't put much stock in some form of actual devil. What I was leading to and sort of deliberately not saying is that "the devil" is someone else's god, like Baal for the early Hebrews following El (JHWH). Or for that matter, if deva is Hindu, then him/her.
ReplyDeleteKaren, as for the source of evil, there are two in my opinion. I follow M. Scott Peck in one, that it is the oldest identified mental illness, just objectified and projected. From the other source, the tremendous stretch between the impersonal workings of nature and the personal closeness of suffering. In other words much evil is the taking of natural events in both the world and in our societies as some kind of personal event. We rightfully struggle against these. I include in that the consequences of wrong headedness and ignorance.
Someone like Hitler is mentally ill in that first sense, that class of illness that our churches identified ages ago. Peck claims that most of this kind of illness appears in households, in private. Peck is by the way a religious psychologist. If you want to get his whole thesis, then read the book People Of The Lie.
Though you talk about Christianity here, there is something in both of these that appeals to various Pagan mythologies, too. I'm not going to try to dissect either poem, but wanted to let you know that I appreciated them from a different angle.
ReplyDeleteRachel, I didn't really write them from the Christian viewpoint. So you are probably appreciating these poems much closer to the spirit in which I wrote.
ReplyDeleteI am at home with certain Christian traditions and views but left the church for lack of interest. I tried Unitarian Universalist for about ten years but ultimately found that the choir was more important than the church, just the same as with my adolescent Christian experience.
I tried UU to see if the notion of worshipping in public actually added anything to my spiritual walk. It did but not enough to overcome some other aversions. I figure a ten year trial is long enough.
I still miss the choir a little but didn't miss the church itself, not one day.
I invite you to read my current post about Bebelplatz. Now that's evil.
ReplyDeleteLucifer bringt die absolute Klarheit der Kristallnacht
ReplyDeleteGhost, you have outdone yourself. I must have hit one down your alley. I know very well what Kristallnacht is.
ReplyDeleteI might pick a bone in regards to Lucifer who is an old God in disguise and one of the ancient archetypes. The perpetrators of that night were, as many of them considerred themselves, good God fearing Christians of the Nazi persuasion. They would have been adamant that Lucifer was nowhere around. I would tend to agree but for different reasons.
Your picture is exquisite and I would recommend anyone looking there. It is for me by far the best thing you have posted here.
crystal clarity has many facets my friend..... Lucifer illuminates the darkness in the soul of Man in the sight of God.... alas the usurper remains the servant....
ReplyDeleteGhost, I am glad you think of me as a friend. I intend to be :)
ReplyDeleteTo call Lucifer a usurper is to remain within the Christian myth. To call Lucifer a servant is to illuminate :) one of the primary aspects of deity. To recognize the linguistic ties between devil, deva, deus is to date Lucifer as prior to even ancient Greek culture from which Lucifer as a name comes. The usurper idea is too new to match Lucifer's lineage.
But on the other hand, I have not seen Him on active protest. Perhaps it amuses Him to be so misconstrued. That He should illuminate darkness, that makes Him servant of both man and God. I have a feeling Lucifer can be seen as an aspect of Hermes, or Hermes as an aspect of Lucifer.
Indra's net is cast far and wide through the cosmos and in the shining facets of that infinite jewel, there is a place where the constellation that is dei, deu, dev, dem, theo, deo, is clarified by luci and carried by fer, pher.
As the message bearer of the gods, Hermes is very close to the light bearer of us all.
tricky isn't it :)
ReplyDeleteOh indeed. Navigation is a foundational skill. If you sail off into the cosmic mind, it might be well if you can find your way home again.
ReplyDeleteTo wander mindless on the planet because you get lost can be humiliating, kind of loamy at best. Humus is earth by another name, fertile earth, full of nutrition.
Lucifer and all the images that go with him are frightening and intriguing at the same time. I remember the first time seeing an artist's rendetion of him in a religious book and that image has stayed with me still. I did like this one!
ReplyDeleteI know that Lucifer! I checked out Ghost's picture too.
ReplyDelete