Thursday, September 3, 2009

Holding You

I had a harsh morning and a relentless afternoon, then I went to a meeting and found out that there were many people struggling harder than I am with these issues of mine. I came home and realized that the next poem simply wasn't one I would post, so I skipped it and came to this one.

Tonight I miss my cat, and with that the tiny little hooks that lead to all the other lost cats, the wife, the mom, the dad, the many friends, all gone now. Thank God I know what to do. I have done it, am doing it. As my friend Vivian says, Relentless Forward Movement. That came from her extreme marathon running husband. He's gone now too, a heart event that occurred at the end of a mountain marathon. He finished, and finished well, but then he died, too far from the medics who could have saved him had they been able to get there. Relentless Forward Movement.

I am in between a rock and a hard place. Nothing new. Same old. Yet this time is new if the stuff in it isn't and I will go on. Of course I will. I am not alone. Nor are you.

Holding You

Spidersilk, silver
and stronger than beautiful
holds you as I spun
for you before this
life in another, knew you
then, knew you would need
it now, my princess.

February 10, 2009 2:48 PM

21 comments:

  1. Heart stuff Christopher ...tugs and
    beauty. Really
    Linda

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  2. Relentless Forward Movement - one foot in front of the other. One day at a time. {christopher}

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  3. Thank you, Linda.

    {{{Liz}}}

    Karen, yes.

    Constant, Techno. That's impossible on my own power. God, make me willing because I'm not.

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  4. This is very tender, Christopher...

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  5. Cath! It seems a really long time since I last saw a comment. I hope all has been well.

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  6. Wonderful, and appropriate metaphor for something wonderful as well...barely visible, yet stronger than steel.

    "The ties that bind, they are barbed and spined, and hold us close forever." -- Joanna Newsom

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  7. To loosen the grip
    to breathe in sweet morning air
    is to recapture freedom again my love...........

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  8. spider woman

    Spider Woman possessed supernatural power at the time of creation, when Dine (Navajo) emerged from the third world into this fourth world - the world of Time and Physicality.

    At that time, monsters roamed the land and killed many people. Since Spider Woman loved the people, she gave power for Monster-Slayer and Child-Born-of-Water to search for the Sun-God who was their father. When they found him, Sun-God showed them how to destroy all the monsters on land and in the water.

    Because she preserved their people, Dine (Navajo) established Spider Woman among their most important and honored Deities. She chose the top of Spider Rock for her home. It was Spider Woman who taught Navajo ancestors of long ago the art of weaving upon a loom.

    spiders and other spinsters indeed...

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  9. Joseph, thank you for coming back as you do.

    Cherie, It is not only misery that keeps hold. It is also the memory of holy joy.

    Rachel, we all have this lovliness.

    Ghost, I am not sure but I think, I choose to read your last line as "spiders and other spinners indeed". I think spinsters means something out of context, maybe.

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  10. Ghost may well have meant spinsters :)

    I love this Christopher, I would like to think that someone, somewhen wove a silver line to save me even though he knew not when.....and who knows, maybe he did.

    xx

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  11. Since we almost never know anything about past lives we also cannot know who and how deeply connected we have been in those lives. The threads of salvation are probably countless, an immense web. That web is part of what Hindus call Indra's Net.

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  12. Webster's

    Main Entry: spin·ster
    Pronunciation: \ˈspin(t)-stər\
    Function: noun
    Date: 14th century
    1 : a woman whose occupation is to spin
    2 a archaic : an unmarried woman of gentle family b : an unmarried woman and especially one past the common age for marrying
    3 : a woman who seems unlikely to marry

    my meaning could be ambiguous, however there was definitely spinning involved... :)

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  13. Gorgeous spinning.

    Relentless Forward Movement - oh my, I know this. You've named it and others, as I understand. Thank you for that. I can weild it better now.

    Wondering if we can weave for you, us of the so far away and only in blogs? I'm sure there are some formidable spinners and weavers amongst us.
    xo
    erin

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  14. Amen Erin you definitely being one of those
    Linda

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  15. It's interesting, Ghost, that I would have put the usage you list as most common as least common. That's how it seems in my life. I got that too when I pondered your usage, that it was probably correct in some way...and I wouldn't call spinster, an unmarried woman as archaic at all, especially with the overtones of single long past the usual age. I grew up with that as normal usage and while old, I am not archaic :)

    Erin, my friend, I am happy to give and receive the weavings. I think you do weave for me, and as Linda says, do not doubt your abilities.

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  16. the meanings are probably related....

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  17. I totally get you missing your cat. My 20 year old Siamese (he was a true Buddha in a cat suit) died almost 2 years ago and I still miss him. I now have four more cats, but they're not him. Loss is one of the hardest parts of life, but I learned very early on (lost my father, grandfather, 2 aunts, four cousins and an uncle before I was 11 years old)that it was an inevitable part of life.

    Erin has taught me so much about love among blog friends and our special, unique connections. I don't know what I'd do without so many poet/blog friends...you're all like a HUGE gift from the Universe, all of us connected by a strongly woven web of love, friendship and hope. Blessings, Christopher!

    PS: A passage by Kahlil Gibran that I admire about death:

    "You would know the secret of death. But how shall you find it unless you seek it in the heart of life? The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day cannot unveil the mystery of light. If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life. For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one."

    (Now you know why I use the word "prolixity" in my blog title. I'm a long-winded Southern woman....LOL!)

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  18. Southern Woman, you have met your verbose match in me! Please don't ever think I would prefer you keep it brief. I just hope you can remember the big lesson that you can't say it all at once. It is simply not possible. It is likely impossible to say it all, period.

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The chicken crossed the road. That's poultry in motion.


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