Wednesday, January 26, 2011

In The Garage - Three Word Wednesday

That's a famous portrait of the young May Sarton with an elder May sitting beneath.

"Everything that slows us down and forces patience, everything that sets us back into the slow circles of nature, is a help. Gardening is an instrument of grace." - May Sarton

May Sarton is the pen name of Eleanore Marie Sarton (3 May 1912 – 16 July 1995), an American poet, novelist, and memoirist. Born in Belgium, she died of breast cancer and is buried in Nelson, New Hampshire.

May wrote over fifteen books of poetry, over twenty novels, and over ten non-fiction works, principally memoirs.

Three Word Wednesday has assigned the following words and said, "Do something!" I thought of how terrible I am at building stuff even though I am a designer for industry and here is the result.

conniption; noun: a bad tantrum. One has a conniption or conniption fit.

janky; adjective: broken or functioning poorly or improperly; messed up.

scooch; verb: to move over, or to scoot.

In The Garage

No matter how I try
It's all janky now.
Design by conniption don't
work at all. I pound
those nails, pound them down
with Goddam all attitude
and all I get is
itchy butt, forces
me to scooch across the floor
like some little dogs
I know.

Written January 26, 2011 7:50 PM

Postscript: I wish I had more time to tarry and read. Perhaps tomorrow. I am fresh back to work and am buried under production pressure, putting the design package together to install a new laminator and infeed conveyors to lay down dough for the Nabisco Premium cracker baking line.


  1. Can feel the irritation and a great fun poem to read!!

  2. I should know how it feels Chris, but mine is having conniption on my janky lappy na...:)

    I am smiling at your poem anyway!!!

  3. I really don't know what gets into me sometimes. :D

    The devil made me do it.

  4. That's a good fun poem Christopher.
    I've banged a good few nails in my time but I used to get sore knees.

  5. I love that poem! I've known such little dogs...and myself have done it. Backscratched the doorpost too.

  6. Bears will wear off the tree bark. Certain corners in my house now have thin paint coats. I got a back scratcher as a gift for purchasing stuff from a certain website. This backscratcher has a radio antenna handle with the scratching hand made of bent thin gage stainless steel all nicely polished. It's a little sharp because of the thin gage but that just presents a learning curve. There is a certain place high up on my back that just drives me crazy. That scratcher gets it just fine. I think I prefer a good back scratch to sex any more.

  7. I have to say, however you feel about the poem, "design by conniption" is a priceless phrase. I may have to start using that in my everyday conversation.

  8. I am a designer for industry and this phrase is natural in my life. Design by conniption is just a higher order than design by anxiety, a really common state of being in my game. In the beginning of my career we designed by coffee and cigarettes.

    Once I worked for owners, partners who managed by shut doors between them and us as much as possible.

  9. hey Christopher, hope it didn't feel like I spiked your coffee.

    this one reminds me of the Calvin and Hobbes where Calvin has pounded a bunch of nails all bent over into his mother's coffee table and she comes in as he is WAP! WAP! WAPPING!

    she screams "what are you doing!!??"

    confused he answers "is this some sort of trick question?"

    I like the "Goddam" part the best

    thank you for keeping your sense of humor (though I am pretty sure if my mom had a blog, she would block me, days ago)

  10. You're okay with me, dusty who. I lol'ed about your mom blocking you. I am not sure I know how to do that on blogger. I guess there is a way. But you can re-identify and buy a new computer. Then we go through it all over again. I can see your mom losing patience. :D

  11. what? but she's my mother, she better not loose patience.

    she doesn't have a blog, and she does have eternal patience (moms are the best like that) She is however pretty darn religious. That Jesus jokes would crush her, but I would never say some of the things I do on her blog (if she had one)

    It practically kills me when I she the look on her face when she smells cigarettes. And then there is the whole going to hell deal. Those looks are few and far between, but always get immediate corrective behavior from me

    (plus when women her you talk about your mom like that, they practically fall into your bed, nekid)


  12. Mr. Who, I am absolutely comfortable with the way my word ver. is effing you. :D

    It is not me in any way and yet operates like that on my site totally with my approval. Become totally paranoid about it. It is a computer algorithm in pernicious action. It completely deserves all paranoia. It absolutely means every bit of the innuendo it leaves behind. It offends me at every opportunity, so don't think you are the only one. Also, in casy you hadn't noticed, ALL the word ver. sites are linked, or maybe are just one site, the same as we can't tell if it is identical myriad electrons or one electron arising everywhere.

  13. I like your style and this poem is great !!

  14. Horse and Moon, thank you for saying so.

  15. you handled the prompt very, very well. I salute you for it.


The chicken crossed the road. That's poultry in motion.

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