The Mermaid Waves Goodbye
I looked to you once
and once again to be sure
of my place nearby.
The salt air and sand
and the submerged rocks, high tide
not yet full and still
the taste of this shore
will linger on my palate
beyond this last time.
November 28, 2010 6:38 AM
Seems to me a sad poem Christopher, a final farewell so to speak...
ReplyDeleteYes, the last line gives that away. The character in the poem believes this is the last time.and the lines before suggest that he (she? are mermaids ever lesbian? Why wouldn't they be?) believes the memory will last a very long time.
ReplyDeleteHowever, if you want, this is a cycle of absence rather than a permanent condition because it is "this last time" and not "the last time", a near perfect lesson in how word choice of a single word can change everything for poet and reader alike - why a poet needs to use words with great care - or how word choice can make the difference between great and mediocre poetry using the same story.
ReplyDeleteThe sort of poem that lingers in the air, isn't it. And yet I read "this last time" as being one of many 'last times" (perhaps to coincide with a spring tide or a neap tide--) and it sounded so final, so sad, maybe a secret knowledge that there might not be another 'last time".
ReplyDeleteLovely, something to ponder. Thank you
(and oh, yes, the right word sometimes changes everything, even in poetry)
Mittens, thank you for your comment. I have lost energy and am now getting back in the saddle, I hope.
Deletei like the voice you bring to this, Christopher. Truly. it resonates.
ReplyDeleteThank you again.
DeleteA melancholy and lovely poem. Hope you yourself are not waving goodbye altogether...
ReplyDeleteI have hit some kind of stop but I am not beyond hope. :)
DeleteGood luck, Christopher. I think I know where you appear to be at right now.
ReplyDeleteYou know more than I do. :) Thank you.
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