Yesterday I had to go in and have a back molar pulled. It was capped. This was a tooth that required root canals decades ago. A couple days ago it cracked longitudinally along one root. That led to an abscess. I have Kaiser as my medical and dental, so I had just a few minutes to asses whether or not I trusted this guy over some other stranger I would deal with later. The good news is that I could have it done on Saturday as an emergency procedure. It turned out okay but I am in more pain today than I was with the abscess. It is interesting how much psychology is in this though. Even though the pain is worse, I can take it better because I know what is happening. When it was the abscess, I didn’t know. The Percoset isn’t worth much as a pain killer. I will need tomorrow off from work.
It is odd that a poem like the following shows up next in line during this Easter weekend.
It Is Finished
As I stand upright
on the wall in the middle
of my holy name
I see farther than
all the works of man display.
I breathe cool free air
and ready myself
for the long final journey
to the central fire.
April 30, 2009 9:12 AM
Hurry
6 days ago
Not odd at all, Christopher. It's entirely fitting that this poem on this day.
ReplyDeleteI hope you feel better soon, and I wish you a blessed Easter.
Hi Karen. Hope all is well.
ReplyDeleteUg. I have to have a crown put on this Thursday. Today I will pick up my perscription for Valium, so as to endure the torture. Without it I shake so bad in the chair, they are unable to work. HATE the dentist. I hear your pain. Sending Vicodin.
ReplyDeleteOuch, Christopher. I hope the pain is better.
ReplyDeleteAs far as the poem goes and oddness-- seems fitting somehow(as Karen pointed out). This is what happens with you. I mean... somehow you have this strange way with time and connections... poems often fall into place... don't they?
My love to you,
Liz (The Laundress ;) )
Not much better yet. The swelling has gone down but the pain persists. Damn.
ReplyDeleteLiz, you are right about how stuff happens with me. I don't orchestrate it or plan it, but it does just happen and it happens on the edge of what people might call often. I have actually run my life in big ways on the basis of this kind of thing because it happens often enough to feel deep and trustworthy. I have not aimed at some sort of remarkable life which is good news since I don't have a remarkable life. Instead I have assumed that fate or God or whatever has me where I am "supposed" to be because I have followed the cues.
I wish I could say I was really good at following the cues. I am not. I have a feeling I have flinched a few times and held back. I pray I have not held back too much. That would mean I am not where I am supposed to be. I pray that none of my gaffes have been to big to surmount and that my right choices have allowed me the privilege of a good life.
I have not ever had feedback that my life has turned out right. I don't think very many people get that kind of feedback. I think we are supposed to take that on faith or not.
squat on the curb
ReplyDeletei gesture at the son
with toothless fire
i curse the day of my birth
gripping the empty bottle
with both hands
squeezing its throat
like a mad dog
easter service
GD
obviously, an alternate title could be "it is finished".
ReplyDeleteGhost, I think I shall reply to you like this:
ReplyDeleteResurrection
The toothless goddess
smiles vacantly at my hope.
I am old and smell
bad, smell like cold flesh
from an empty gray coffin.
How I feel sometimes,
how it is this day
of days. It is said of Him,
said He rises up
but I see no sign.
I see through all the whitewash.
God, I miss you so.